This is my personal blog, where I write about my personal views and opinions, personal experiences, and personal feelings, all seen from my point of view. If you are offended by anything I write here, then I sincerely apologize that you decided to read a blog that don't mix well with your personal feelings. Tough luck, love.
Hey, this is meant to be an honest blog, after all. Now, for the record, I will never mention actual names, especially if I'm talking about something negative (I will mention names, however, if I want to give someone positive attention cause they deserve it), cause I'm not one for pointing direct fingers like that, but I am entitled to write whatever the hell I want considering that this is my blog. Sure, when I talk about people in my entries, if you know me very well you might be able to guess who I'm talking about, but if you don't know me then I find it highly unlikely that you'll know who it is. If you read something I've written and find it offensive cause you feel like it's about you, then congratulations. Either you're right, and you've made enough imprint on me for me to feel something about it and decide to write it down, or you think way too highly of yourself. Either way, remember that this is my blog. It's kind of like a diary, only that I let others read it. If you don't like it, don't read it. Simple as that.
The reason for this random blurb is that I had a rather rude encounter the other day. Someone came up to me and accused me of hanging someone online, making fun of them and talking trash about them all over the internet, and it left me wondering what the eff was wrong with that certain someone. Firstly, you don't do something like that in the middle of town, out of the blue, cause it's rude and disrespectful, and secondly, get your friggin facts straight before you accuse people.
I know what's the actual reason behind the accusations, and I just got to say that it's idiotic. I told the person very firmly that I have never "hanged" someone by their name in any way, nor have I done so "all over the internet" as claimed. I have talked about my feelings regarding certain people, and how I personally perceive things that has happened, and I did so in my blog. Again, keyword here is my blog. And if people find what I feel offensive, then wow. You care way too much about what I feel, and you should sit down and figure exactly why my feelings matter so much to you. Just sayin'.
Okay?
Okay.
Now that we've gotten that out of the way, let's move on to other things.
My birthday was yesterday!! =D
Wow. 29. One
year older now, one year closer to 30 and the biggest celebration so far
in this life of mine, and one full year of amazing experiences that has
made me a year wiser. It's been another turbulent year, but I wouldn't trade it for the world. I got to learn a lot of new things, mainly about myself, and I've walked quite far down this new path I started on a while back. I've had my ups and downs, but in general I've been happier than ever before. My smile is a genuine one, and proof that I'm generally a happier person, with a more positive attitude. Mainly because of what happened two years ago, of course. Killing off a part of myself was the best decision I've ever done, and I truly see the proof of that now. No regrets, my loves! No regrets!
Do I have any plans now that I've reached a new milestone in my life? Yeah, plenty!
First of all, I'm gonna keep following the original plan set for 2014, about focusing more on my inner world and see where that gets me. Secondly, I'm gonna kill off the last remains of an old fear. It's not that I'm afraid to be me and show people who I truly am, cause I'm really not. Not anymore. But the last remains of that fear is still lurking around, and it's trying to chain me at times. I don't like chains. Not when I'm not in control of them. So, those last remains needs to go. Permanently.
You know, I've already said that I have a good feeling about this year. It'll be a good one. But I also have a general good feeling about my next year of living. As in, from now and until my next birthday. When I reach the age of 30, I'll have reached the point in my life where I want to be. I just know it. I have a goal ahead of me, and I just know I'll be able to reach it this year. And that's a pretty awesome feeling to have.
I am confident, and have faith in myself.
And that alone will take me anywhere I want to go!
Først til den første delen: Drit i enkelte..... VI som e deg nær vet hva som er riktig og vet at det IKKE er du som gjør galt der <3
SvarSlettSå til del to: Det synes sååå godt at du er blitt en "ny" person og at du har det bedre med deg selv. Helt enig med deg i at det blir en fint 2014 og at du får MYE bra ut av det. Stå på <3
Takk, mamma! Gla i deg <3
SlettI didn't think I would do this, but I would like the opportunity to defend myself.
SvarSlettYou wrote in an earlier entry that all my friends hatet me and warned you that I was only using you. You tried to hide it from me and defend me? If so, then I guess everythin I heard is incorrect. It didn't seem like that when people you know and talk to approche me. Do you actually think that I let yo live with me during your psychosis and depression for over a year as an elaborate scheeme to use you. I held you when you cried, and did my best to make you happy again, but you call it manipulation? I thought I was doing something good for you. I am heartbroken to hear that I am considered evil by the person I was only trying to help. You seem to defend this with the statement I made about loving you, but you fail to mention the circumstanses. You had a meltdown and you claimed that noone had ever loved you. All I wanted was to reassure you that you where, even by me. You never even mention that when I met my husband we where friends with benefits, i don't know that means to you, but to me it means you're free to meet someone else. I even told you about the whole event and still im accused of shocking you with these news. You're so quick to shoot me down when I do something that hurts you, but you're always excused cause of your disorders. I have diagnoses of my own. ADHD, depression, anxiety, unspesific dissosiative disorder and I am currently undergoing testing for autism spectrum disorders. But no one ever considered my struggles in any way, I am just the heartless bitch who took advantage of you, when in reality I only acted accordingly to our agreements. I have realized that you was hurt in the prossess and I regret that, but I do not have the abillity to "read between the lines". All I did was in good faith.I have made mistakes, but I am not heartless or decieving. And the fact that the person who used to know me the best can portray me like this really hurts and it makes me feel like maybe you didn't. In your latest entry you defend what you've been writing about me in your blog, and claim that if Im hurt its my problem. What you fail to realize is that people around me and you are too. Did you know that in my wedding my own uncle and anty sat quietly and shook their heads at me. On what was to be the happiest day of my life. I can't describe how much that hurt. You might feel like you never did anything wrong, but you have hurt me too on several occations. What I concluded with was that you are just human and you make mistakes, I just wish that I was treated the same.